Balance in Life...

He lost his 20 year corporate job and was feeling devastated.

His spouse gave him all the support he needed and asked him to try out a new career with a skill of influencing he had.

He became a Speaker.

He started churning out speeches on YouTube, Podcasts, began to get sufficient viewers and listeners. He began to carve a niche for himself. He was being recognized as the fastest growing "influencer," and in his reflections he was regretting how he spent 90% of his time at work and neglected both his family and other hobbies.

He transformed his life completely, thanks to his spouse who sparked the idea in him and his close friends too for spreading the word.

He decided that he wouldn't repeat that mistake any more and like he had made good investments of the money he earned, he recast his investments on his personal life too and divided the 24 hours equally -

8 hours to earn money

8 hours for the family

8 hours for rest, relaxation, reading, hobby etc.

And this time he reconnected with some of the other things he used to indulge in and that was dramatics. Thus he began to create another avenue for an alternate living by which he could either act, direct or script stories, write lyrics for songs or write screen plays.

Everyone admired him for creating a new life opening up so many avenues using all the resources he had in him.

When we are focused, have self-belief and are confident, with hardwork, perseverance  and patience we can do wonders.

Let this story spark your imagination too. Don't wait for something to hit you hard and then struggle to restart life.

 

 

 

 

 

Finding Yourself

In the recent happening around the world due to the pandemic, it seems most of us have forgotten ourselves. You may for a moment also think, "Yes, I have..., but, it doesn't work that way."

You aren't a currency note left in last years' winter coat pocket.

You aren't lost either.

Your true self is right their beneath your skin under  cultural conditioning, other people's opinions and inaccurate conclusions you drew while growing up as a kid, that became your beliefs about who you are.

Finding Yourself," is actually returning to yourself, an unlearning, an excavation, a remembering who you were, before the world got its hands on you.

Don't be impressed by money/titles/followers/degrees/appearances/social media/big words... instead be influenced by kindness/trustworthiness/authenticity/genuinity/generosity/integrity/honesty/sincerity/optimism...etc.

Rumours is one of them.

Rumours are carried by haters, spread by fools,  fanned by cynics who shoot from others' shoulders and all this is believed by "idiots," at the top, bottom, left, right, straight and centre.

Be responsible - you can't stop rumours or rumour mongers, but you certainly can squash them by arresting it from spreading no further by not contributing to it anymore.

Just like breaking the chain so to control the virus doesn't spread, rumours also need to be arrested by breaking the chain and we maintain social distancing with "rumour" and  "gossip," mongers who can cause our psyche untold damage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Pi of Chai

Take teabags of different brands, physically their labels and colors will be different the strings could be different but what could be common is the size and quantity of tea dust in the back.

The difference or similarity doesn't end there because what real make the difference ultimate is that which is inside the tea bag - the colour, the aroma, the flavour, the taste of what's inside the bag.

To demonstrate this we need to hear this story.

At a fair in a village a balloon seller was there selling colorful balloons. He filled up a red balloon with helium and left it skywards. Children would look at the balloon and pester their parents to buy it for them. He did that with a blue, then a green, then a yellow and then a pink.

A curious child watching all of this from the corner cane rushing went to the balloon seller and pointing to a white balloon asked whether even that would fly that high?

The balloon seller showed the helium can and said all balloons will and can fly as it depends on the gas it has in it.  So it has nothing to do with the colour but with what's inside it.

The same principle holds good - for the tea-bags, balloons and even us - it is what's inside that matter most.

 

Shades not Shadows

When I gained enough cofidence, the stage was gone.

When I was sure of losing the game, I won.

When I needed people the most, I found me alone.

When my tears dried, I found a shoulder to cry on.

When I mastered the skill of hating people, I found someone who loved me more than life.

I find telling others what to do and not to, but, when it comes to me, the same things hurt.

This is life...

I know if I have the courage to begin, I also have the courage to succeed, but, how do I measure success.

Someone tells me success isn't measured by where I've reached now as much as I have climbed over the many obstacles and from the depths to reach the top.

I know that the difference between success and failure is hard work and determination, yet, when someone else succeeds I think it is luck.

It is this flaw, as much as many more that makes me up I am trying to correct, because mistakes help me learn and the more I learn the better I become, as my awareness, leads me to curiosity.

The more and more I seek the more and more I gain. That is the difference between just knowing and become wise.

So sometime in life I need to run away from all not just to keep distance, but also to see who is following me.

If there's in light in front of me, what follows me is my "Shadow," which has not different "Shades," but one, and that's none but me.

I learnt all this because life, is much larger than me.

When I look at more and more people and  things outside me I realize what my life, is.

It is enlightenment that can make all the difference in life.

It is beautiful if I am willing to learn, to unlearn, to relearn, to adapt, to reinvent and to grow, else I am a statue - erected, unchangeable on which  pigeon's and birds love dropping constantly.

 

 

You have to...

We can share any amount of learning, but, we can't grow your knowledge, you have to.

We can have a lot of delicious things made, but, can't taste it for your approval, you have to.

We can create any number of offerings, but, can never compel experiences, you have to.

We can show you the path, but, can't travel for you, you have to.

We can create any number of invitations, but, we can never guarantee enjoyment, you have to.

We can only offer you bread and butter, you have to eat, bite chew, eat and digest it.

We can empathize with your pain, but, we can't endure it for you, you have to.

We will say, we are there for you and support you overcome obstacles I life, you have to work to overcome them.

Life is out there with everything, you have to choose what's good for you and everyone around you so you can make a life worth remembering and emulating.

 

The Grammatic Family

Long long ago somewhere in England lived a couple Mr. Noun and Ms. Verb."

Mr. Noun, is handsome, but, generally an eavesdropper.

Ms. Verb, is very beautiful and is in action always.

They had three children - a son named Pronoun, and two beautiful daughters who the named Adverb and Adjective.

As usual the son Pronoun has to do all the work in case any one in the family is absent.

The two lovely daughters love each other but do have some differences.

Adjective loves everyone and always adds more value to whoever they are attached to in the family.

Adverb, too on the other hand loves everyone and enhances everyone's worth to show they are attached, as if to say, "I am there whenever you need me."

The family had two faithful servants Preposition and Conjunction, serving them all through.

Preposition, is the principle servant which is principally only at the service of his master always, whereas, Conjunction, is the common servant for everyone in the family and serves them well/equally always.

In all this there's a visitor to the family, Interjection, who makes his appearance only in good times, bad times, surprise times, exciting shocking times etc.

Thus this family not just lived but, spread over the years. This family has presence in most parts of the world and is spoken officially too.

The family has influenced not just culture but, has dominated business, too.

Indeed the family has left an indelible - legacy for mankind, though there are other families too with their own language, grammar and style.

All families co-exist leaving people to choose whatever they like.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don't we?

I believe yes, people do matter over everything else.

Let's imagine this pandemic happening 20+ years ago with very little technology support.

We may have been using our landlines not caring even for a moment what the bill could run into.

Despite technology it seems it has been people who have helped us a great deal.

 Apart from medicines, food supplies and essentials that people helped us with, the connect, the feeling of being together, the assurance of we are together etc., have helped us tide over several difficult days now.

Looking at the pickle jar theory - the huge rocks represent spouse, children, family and health. The perceived importance for job, house, car, luxuries are all pebbles that fit into spaces after the rocks. Sand fills whatever space is left over and the story goes there's still some space more for water.

All this is only after taking care of the rocks.

One cannot understate the importance of money and the needs/wants, it fulfills, but, it all comes only after people.

Gratification in life comes only when one knows to gather (people)

keep and share (affection, love and respect),

build (relationships),

and

cherish (moments).

Love you people, everyone of you and thanks for being there helping me being here and saying all that I am with gratitude from the bottom of my heart. Be Blessed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

History, Heritage and Hindsight’s,

...are powerful teachers, but we are too much in a hurry, to reach higher ground, to learn from them....

...don't be so busy to get from here to there, that you forget, how you got here from there...

If you want to connect the dots between all your yesterday's and hopeful tomorrow's, start with your back story...

Embracing and sharing your back-story...

01. Connects us to our purpose and vision - for life, career, business...

02. Allows us to celebrate our strengths by remembering, how we got from there to here...

03. Deepens our understanding of our unique value and what differentiates us from the rest of the world...

04. Reinforces our core values...

05. Helps us act in alignment and to make value-based decisions...

06. Encourages us to be responsive to people's needs rather than be reactive to people or situations...

07. Attracts people who want to support people who reflect and represent their values...

08. Builds an image that gives us a story to tell...

09. Attracts like minded people we want to be with...

10. Helps us stay motivated and continue to do the work we are proud of...

Rewind, Reflect, Reposition are characteristics of growth-minded people...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What "is in" is "what Spills"

You are standing with a "cup of coffee," in your hands and someone bumps into you to spill the coffee. This gets you become irritated and angry.

But, why did you spill coffee?

Because someone bumped into you.

Wrong answer.

Had there been tea in the cup, even would have spilled!

 

Whatever is in the cup spills.

Therefore when life comes along and shakes you (which will happen), then whatever is in comes out. You just can't fake when rattled.

 

So we need to ask ourselves what's in our cup?

 

When life gets tough what spills over?

Humility, joy, thankfulness, gratitude, peace forgiveness..

or

Anger, hatred, harsh words, bitterness abuse...

 

You have to choose, and all choices are yours...

yet, recommendation would be to choose

 Affection,

Care

Cheerfulness

Compassion

Delight

Excitement

Gracefulness

Happiness

Humility

Joy

Intimacy

Kindness

Love

Motivation

Nectar

Opportunities

Passion

Patience

Quality

Quietness,

Respect

Sweetness

Tranquillity

Uniqueness

Versatility

Wonder

Yearning and

Zest...

 

 

 

Comfort Zone..

 

A king got a gift of two beautiful Macau Parrots.

He would see them on the branch of a tree opposite the window of room he spent most time - reading, relaxing, writing or listening to music.

 

He was worried to see one of the parrots wasn't moving at all while the other was flying, so he sent word to the parrot trainer (it is believed there were people like that in those days), to take a look. The next day when the king saw both the Macau Parrots flying called the parrot trainer to reward him. Just after he have away the award, he asked the parrot trainer what did he do to make both birth take to their wings. The parrot Trainer replied, "I just chopped off the branch of the tree on which the Macau was

 

That's the comfort zone.

Taking this to our lives, most of us in the journey of life settle down on the branches of comfort zones till someone like a -mother, father, sister, brother, close friend, teacher, mentor, coach or anyone of influence comes over to nudge us out of our comfort-zones.

 

We all need this in out life. Keep looking out for anyone of them who can appear anytime and after that your life will not be the same. You will be flying too.

 

 

Being vs Doing

 

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but, where he stands in times of challenge and controversy." ~Martin Luther King

 

In any context or any given situation, being, is more crucial than doing.

 

Doing (Action/Execution), is achieved only when there's proper Being (Motivation/Drive).

 

Life happen by being in the moment, than doing, and most profound things occur not by doing but just by being.

 

Coaching, Mentoring, Leadership, or even Friendship, is all about Being, than Doing.

 

Doing is never going to be enough, if we aren't mindful of Being.

 

The highest levels of creativity is due to being than doing.

 

This seems to be so true in the present context.

 

The world around us is suddenly different, taking a huge shift throwing us out-of-balance.

 

It is equally amazing how we are able to face everything with confidence despite our day-to-day support dwindling and coming to a complete halt.

 

We will be lying if we say we aren't scared, but, it is also true that the confidence each of us has within is much greater than the challenge.

 

That is what human beings, are and that's what they will keep doing, - survive and fight till the last breath.

 

After all, how long can this storm ⚡🌧️⛈️ ⚡last!

In the end it has to bring a 🌈 rainbow.

 

 

 

 

Personal Touch

 

Old and frail, losing sense of touch, smell, taste, sight and a bit of hearing, but when brought to touching distance smell is revived, when anything touches the tongue that tingles the taste buds, going close the sight gets better even without specs or using a magnifying glass.

 

Words are heard when spoken close, but, heard still better with the earphones. Now the point isn't all of these, but, the personal touch that is given by us to the others especially in tough times like we are going through.

 

It is even more when we touch base with our friends for years who've all been our colleagues and are retired now.

 

Occasional calls to them lights them up and when wished on special occasions of their life such as a birthday makes it even more joyful and happy.

 

We should therefore maintain these contacts and instead of exchanging cold emails or WhatsApp  which are virtual, just pick your mobile and dial the friends number just to hear him/her say "Hello.." would do a world of good to all.

 

In the space of this lockdown I have spoken to at least 80% of my personal contacts. That itself gives me immense satisfaction.

 

"An apple a day, keeps the doctor away," is an old saying, let's revive it this way, "A call a day, keeps the distance away."

 

Cheers!

 

Be Blessed.

 

 

 

Emotions - Intelligence

We all believe we can understand well and particularly others...

We believe we know, what the others mean when they speak... particularly at work...

We also believe we know, what they mean even when they don't speak.. particularly at home...

We may see their faces, hear voices, may hear words, but, can we really understand...

the anticipation in their eyes,

the disappointment in their sighs,

the yearning in their pauses,

the apprehension in their bent heads,

the hope, for acceptance of their words,

the fear in their smiles,

the silences that speak so much more?

 

When we really begin to understand, we will see they aren't the others, but, they're just like us, waiting to be understood.

 

 

 

Times are Changing

I picked my ringing mobile, could identify it was our laundryman.

He asked, "Do you want vegetables?"

Being surprised I responded, "You and vegetables !!"

His reply was so refreshing and growth oriented, "Sir, what is that you don't know...in these days of WFH there aren't too many clothes for laundry and what if I say, flexibility and adaptability are my new friends. My basic skills will remain in tact, am serving needs for survival and found it lucrative."

Was very impressed indeed. He is our regular vegetable vendor now who keeps adding other essentials to his supply shelf.

Always we keep asking people the wrong questions to people.

 

Here is another example.

We often ask, "What do you want to become when you grow up?"

The answers usually are Doctor, Engineer, CA, Pilot, Lawyer, Photographer, Model, Fashion Designer...the list goes on...

The question actually should be "Who do you want to become when you grow up?"

The difference is "What" and "Who."

"What" is  an avocation a profession - you can be even more than one in combinations. One being your base profession, another an interest or a hobby becoming an added avocation - Engineer - Photographer - Musician - Singer - Sportsman and so on...

 

"Who," emphasises on you as a human with values, with character, with integrity...someone who people would love to follow, emulate, someone who will leave a legacy.

You may be an engineer but a corrupt one or be a doctor who only intends to make money doesn't care...

Now that's the difference between "What," and "Who."

 

How time changes things.

From being constantly worried about the future, we can't think anything beyond the present moment.

From being conscious of what to wear, we now are weary of wearing anything other than casuals.

From calling friends and relatives on video calls, we are now calling even our neighbours over video calls.

From longing for a salary hike, we are now waiting for whatever be the salary.

From longing for a promotion, to holding on to whatever the position now.

From trying to change our job, we are now holding on tightly to our current job.

From refusing to carrying the laptop home, we now have made our home the office.

From longing to go on a vacation, we are now longing to get back to our workstation.

From waiting for weekends, we are now waiting for all our fears to end.

From being enveloped in smoggy smokey environs we now have clear skies, we see bright stars in the night's, chirping birds in our neighbourhood and a lot more puree air to breath.

While all of this seems so magical and unbelievable, it seems surprising how an invisible thing could bring about so many changes.

Not surprisingly our faith on the invisible Almighty is so much more now..

Are we paying a big price for losing our innocence or nonchalance and arrogance, or what else?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A List of Alternatives To Winning

We are told and are trained from our childhood, we need to win, we need to be the best in our class, in competitions everything. It is human, it is natural that we grow up too with this habit and practice it even more harder. We want to be the best, we strive even more to be the best. We always want to win - the day, win every argument, win every deal etc., winning is good, but there are alternatives too.

For instance failing too as it teaches us many things for our overall development and temperament too.

Else too the alternatives are

- Caring

- Helping

- Being human

- Growing wiser

- Inspiring others

- Righting wrongs

- Upholding values

- Giving generously

- Learning patience

- Prioritising values

- Practicing empathy

- Building community

- Leading thoughtfully

- Acting with integrity

- Exploring possibilities

- Encouraging progress

- Making a contribution

- Teaching perseverance

- Fostering collaboration

- Experiencing fulfilment

- Working towards mastery

- Changing how people feel

- Questioning the status quo

- Putting people before

  profits

- Creating the future you

   want to see

- Doing work you’re proud to

  have done

It turns out there are more ways to matter than just winning. We get to choose which boxes to tick.

Cheers!

 

A very interesting story must-read.

One Sunday morning, a wealthy man sat in his balcony enjoying the  sunshine🌞 and his coffee ☕when a little ant 🐜caught his eye which was going from one side to the other side of the balcony carrying a big leaf☘️ several times more than its size.

The man watched it for more than an hour. He saw that the ant faced many obstacles during its journey, paused, took a diversion, and then continued towards the destination.

At one point the tiny creature came across a crack on the floor. It paused for a little while, analysed,🤔 and then laid the huge leaf over the crack, walked over the leaf, picked the leaf on the other side then continued🤗 its journey.

The man was captivated by the cleverness 👌of the ant, one of God’s tiniest creatures. The incident left the man in awe 😱and forced him to contemplate the miracle of Creation. It showed the greatness💪 of the Creator. In front of his eyes,👀 there was this tiny creature of God, lacking in size yet equipped with a brain🧠 to analyze, contemplate, reason, explore, discover, and overcome.

A while later the man saw that the creature had reached its destination🎯 – a tiny hole in the floor which was the entrance to its underground dwelling.

And it was at this point that the ant’s shortcoming that it shared with the man was revealed. How could the ant carry into the tiny hole the large leaf that it had managed to carefully bring to the destination? It simply couldn't! So the tiny creature, after all the painstaking and hard work and exercising great skills, overcoming all the difficulties along the way, just left behind the large leaf and went home empty-handed.

The ant had not thought about the end before it began its challenging journey and in the end, the large leaf was nothing more than a burden to it. The creature had no option, but to leave it behind to reach its destination. The man learned a great lesson that day. That is the truth about our lives too.

We worry 😨about our family👨‍👩‍👧‍👦, we worry about our job🏢, we worry about how to earn more money💵💰, we worry about where we should live🏨, what kind of vehicle 🚘to buy, what kind of dresses🧥👚 to wear, what gadgets⌚📱💻🖥️ to upgrade.only to abandon all these things when we reach our destination – We don’t realize in our life’s journey that these are just burdens that we are carrying with the utmost care and fear of losing them, only to find that at the end they are useless and we can’t take them with us.....

 

 

 

 

Hold your dreams

 

Take your first steps towards your passionate idea, which is burning inside you. Though you might not be able to see the entire road clearly now, as you take one step after another, you will see the path unfolding in all clarity.

 

Your long cherished dream might seem too much to handle from your circumstances today. Do not step back from it just because you feel that it might take too long to reach there.

 

Focus on one step, and the next and the next, one at a time. Believe in yourself. Trust your FAITH. Go on.

 

Be patient. It will take its time. Do not try to rush the process. Enjoy and relish, chewing the cud little by little. Experience the joy in every bit.

 

You will hold your dreams in your hand with all gratitude and pride.

 

 

 

 

 

Ducks Quack and Eagles Soar

Three decades ago while undergoing training of Train the Trainer and facilitating TQM, we were deconstructing a case study of a "Cabbie," who from an ordinary one turned out to be a "most preferred cabbie," and how he transformed the others too.

(In short the way the cabbie was dressed, the courtesy he showed, the hospitality he extended, the conveniences provided inside the car, his proactive thinking, spoke volumes of the great "customer service he provided," and how he got referred to become the most sought after cabbie).

He said, it all happened when one passenger during a drive narrated an impactful story and shared the secret of the "POWER OF CHOICE."

We live in a large world - five continents seven oceans, mountains, rivers, beings - humans, birds, animals, plants etc. All of it common to all. Power of choice is that we can be a duck or an eagle.

If we get up in the morning expecting to have a bad day, we'll rarely disappoint ourselves.

Ducks quack, eagles soar.

It isn't about me, you or whoever. It is that we  always hear people quacking and complaining,

We need to resolve to change our attitude and become an eagle.

Let's look around.

We will find people of all varieties, categories, attitudes, character, disciple, and their behaviours at times nasty, unfriendly.

This happens even in business with some having unhappy  customers and doing nothing about it.

It is easy to get caught in such a negative web, so we to decide to make some changes, slowly ... a few at a time.

When we interact with the others, after we choose eagle way, we will experience that others respond well too.

Perhaps compananies can do the same with their customers who also might respond well.

The more we do the more happier we become.

The more companies do the more they make, the more they gain.

Overall it is transforming everything to good.

The whole point then is that we need to decide to stop quacking like a duck and start soaring like an eagle.

We need to start becoming an eagle today, from this very moment ...

We may fail because we tried. We can learn from the failure and get better.

The worst thing is not to have tried at all.

 

We don't die if we fall in water, we die only if we don't even beat our legs, swing our arms and shout for help, especially when we don't know how to swim.

 

That’s the Real Meaning of Life.

 

 

YESTERDAY - TODAY - TOMORROW...

 

Kal..Aaj...aur Kal...

 

The Present (NOW) from The Past (THEN) to

The Future (COMING)...

 

Let me begin from Now..

(A connect wrote about his people and him WFH and his people failing in health because of lack of proper conditions to work, and suggesting that working spaces be made available even in rural areas of India thereby a new business opportunity...invites comments), and I respon👇

 

Pandemic - WFH - Privacy - LOC (Line of Coordination) - HOW (Hours of Work)  - WT/FT (Work Time/Family Time) - Health issue (Mainly improper infrastructure at home etc., are unexpected realities in action. WFH may become the normal in future too.

 

From the Past..

 

I remember a time long ago when Internet became widely available across the country and also a time - - - - - when we would find it difficult to get people to work

- when women used to go for confinement, someone getting injured etc.,

- we would find it difficult to get replacements of high quality, time consuming and so when the suggestion was made by me that people should be allowed the facility of WFH from wherever they were, there was a big hue and cry about security and all sorts of things. That was a bluff, people just didn't buy into a new thought and they were not willing to trust people.

Now all those alleged fears are allayed and the world is working from home.

What I foresaw is happening  - call it destiny or whatever, I can look back and only smile.

 

I wonder if that was taken seriously - am wondering what the scene might have been.

 

I believe it would have been very different and nice.

 

We wouldn't have had urban migration, so many concrete jungles, less crowded cities, more trees, adequate distribution of growth and resources etc.

 

All this restricted to technology companies.

 

The development would have been distributed too.

 

That's an unfulfilled dream.

Let the new normal make all of it a reality.

 

Wanted to continue my response with a QUOTE.

"The right time to plant trees was twenty or more years ago. The next right time is now, else we will regret. The generation yet to be born will curse us and all the generations before for they inherited nothing worthy of being proud."

 

Let's stop...

...the "analysis-paralysis."

...being judgemental

...being fixed mindsets

 

Let's be adventurous,

let's experiment,

let's become confident and let's develop more confidants by trusting and be able to share our thoughts and leverage our SEE -  Skills, Experience, Expertise.

 

Let's -

Revisit - Review - Reflect on past practices

and

let's make

Distribution - Diversity - Development

That I believe, is the key.

 

Thanks to my connect for triggering this thought.

 

Looking forward to your response.

 

 

What's the Story...this day!!!

Every decision we’ve ever made was influenced by a story—every single one. From the decision about whether to wear a mask during a pandemic,  to the charities you choose to support.

A story we heard, the story we believed or that story we told ourselves, had an impact on those choices.

 

If stories are our most persuasive technology, why don’t we do more to put them to work?

 

Why don’t we leverage the power of stories every day in our work and our lives?

 

Over many years now, we’ve come to believe that storytelling is a professional discipline.

A skill for the master storytellers at the Disney’s of the world.

We’ve stopped honing the story skills that came so naturally to our ancestors. We’ve forgotten how to tell small, powerful, everyday stories.

 

Let's try to change that and to help more people leverage the power of storytelling to become their most inspiring selves.

 

We don’t need an epic story to be a great storyteller.

We just need to adopt the posture of a storyteller and to practice the craft together.

 

Let's take this for a start:

 

What's it about life you love?

01. Family

02. Feel good to wake up saying, "I have another day in my hands...! And...I am...

03. Being able to take on the challenges, overcome hardships/obstacles and appreciate everything you have now instead of wanting more.

04. That you are someone who makes a difference in the world.

05. Being alive at the moment because that's what really is the thing that exists right now.

06. The sheer beauty of everything around you.

07. All the good people around you.

08. All the unexpected things.

09. Every moment in life is a new beginning.

10. Creating abundant joy for yourself and others.

11. The diversity that everyone brings to the table.

 

This list can go on and on depending on you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Black Telephone

The black Telephone - What an awesome story!

 

When I was a young boy, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood. I remember the polished, old case fastened to the Wall. The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination

when my mother talked to it.

 

Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was "Information Please" and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.

 

My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbor. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy.

 

I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlor and dragged it to the landing. Climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear.

 

"Information, please," I said into the mouthpiece just above my head.

 

A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.

 

"Information."

 

"I hurt my finger..." I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.

 

"Isn't your mother home?" came the question.

 

"Nobody's home but me," I blubbered.

 

"Are you bleeding?" the voice asked.

 

"No,"I replied. "I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts."

 

"Can you open the icebox?" she asked.

 

I said I could.

 

"Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger," said the voice..

 

After that, I called "Information Please" for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my maths.

 

She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts.

 

Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, "Information Please," and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, "Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?"

 

She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, "Wayne, always remember that there are other worlds to sing in."

 

Somehow I felt better.

 

Another day I was on the telephone, "Information Please."

 

"Information," said in the now familiar voice.

 

"How do I spell fix?" I asked.

 

All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest. When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston. I missed my friend very much.

 

"Information Please" belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me.

 

Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.

 

A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle. I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown

operator and said, "Information Please."

 

Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well.

 

"Information."

 

I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying,

 

"Could you please tell me how to spell fix?"

 

There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, "I guess your finger must have healed by now."

 

I laughed, "So it's really you," I said. "I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time?"

 

"I wonder," she said, "if you know how much your call meant to me.  I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls."

 

I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister.

 

"Please do," she said. "Just ask for Sally."

 

Three months later I was back in Seattle.

 

A different voice answered, "Information."

 

I asked for Sally.

 

"Are you a friend?" she said.

 

"Yes, a very old friend," I answered.

 

"I'm sorry to have to tell you this," She said. "Sally had been working part time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago."

 

Before I could hang up, she said,

 

"Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne ?" "

 

"Yes." I answered.

 

Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. "Let me read it to you."

 

The note said, "Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He'll know what I mean."

 

I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.

 

Never underestimate the impression you may make on others.

 

Whose life have you touched today?

 

Why not pass this on? I just did....

 

Lifting you on eagle's wings.

 

May you find the joy and peace you long for.

 

Life is a journey... NOT a guided tour.

I loved this story and just had to pass it on.

 

 

 

Our Deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our Deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are we not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small doesn't serve the world.

There's nothing enlightened about shrinking

so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously

give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fears,

our presence automatically liberates others.

 

- Nelson Mandela in his inaugural speech, 1994

 

 

Emerging Leader Qualities

 

My observations after lockdowns commenced.

 

Ability to collaborate

with others - even virtually. (WFH - Zoom Calls).

 

Self-assured confidence.

(Can work from anywhere, but, sure can't manufacture anything remotely too).

 

Consistent and constant learning and self-improvement.

(Re-booting, Up-skilling, Up-grading).

 

A propensity for fostering growth in others.

(Step back and make others conduct the on-line meetings, so as to groom them for higher responsibilities).

 

A strong capacity for clear communication.

(Most people during this time have become more expressive, more communicative, looking to network, attend webinars, learn not just more, but also improve their own communication skills).

 

This is the way forward, and also the reality, as I visualize.

 

 

 

You may choose to call it by any name

Self Talk

Self Confidence

Self Encouraging

Self Empowerment

Self Motivation...

If it helps you...

 

Tell yourself:

- I'm allowed to feel what I feel and I'm capable of feeling how you feel too...

- I'm valued and I believe you are valued too...

- I have so much to offer and I'm aware you also have a lot to offer too..

- I'm loved more than I know and I know that you too are  loved more than you know..

- I'm capable of doing amazing things and I know that you can do amazing things too..

 

Come let's join together and widen this space with the same thoughts and get more into our circle

..there's a lot happening out there

...there's so much to do

...there are so many more to connect with...

 

Scripted exclusively for the members of this group R3 - Raman's Random Ramblings

by

Raman

06/08/2020, 15:57 - Shuba Rajan: We were all once children, and still have that child dwelling within us, there's no doubt about that. But, most adults are quite unaware of this.

 

And this lack of conscious relatedness to our own inner child is precisely where so many behavioural, emotional and relationship difficulties stem from.

 

Leads to unnecessary thinking, talking, being judgemental, being sarcastic, being critical that leads to conflicts, disorderliness and disobedience that leads to all the trouble

06/08/2020, 15:57 - Shuba Rajan: Take children in your school, they may or may not listen to their parents but listen to their teachers and are disciplined. The obey them too. Assuming the child in us listened to the appeal of social distancing and lockdown protocols, the pandemic would have been history by now.

06/08/2020, 15:57 - Shuba Rajan: The adults are totally responsible for everything we all are witnessing and experiencing in the world.

06/08/2020, 15:57 - Shuba Rajan: We all have experienced, at some point, that many of the so called adults aren’t adults at all – they have only gotten older in age physically but psychologically speaking that’s not adulthood.

 

True adulthood hinges on acknowledging, accepting and taking responsibility for loving and parenting one own’s inner child.

 

Instead they deny, neglect, abandon and rejected their inner child.

 

This come form societal conditioning of being asked to “grow up” and not behave ‘childishly”.

 

We are taught that in order to become adults we need to stifle and quarantine our inner child – thus losing out on its capacity for innocence, wonder, awe, joy, sensitivity and playfulness alongside.

 

The inner child comprises and potentiates these positive qualities.

 

But it also holds our accumulated childhood hurts, traumas, fears and angers.

 

"Grown-ups" are convinced they have successfully outgrown, jettisoned, and left this child--and its emotional baggage--long behind.

 

But this is far from the truth.

In fact, these so-called grown-ups or adults are unwittingly being constantly influenced or covertly controlled by this unconscious inner child.

 

For many, it is not an adult self-directing their lives, but rather an emotionally wounded inner child inhabiting an adult body.

 

A five-year-old running around in a forty-year-old frame. It is a hurt, angry, fearful little boy or girl calling the shots, making adult decisions.

 

A boy or girl being sent out into the world to do a man's or woman's job.

 

A five or ten-year old (or two of them!) trying to engage in grown-up relationships.

 

Can a child have a mature relationship?

A career?

An independent life?

 

Yet this is precisely what's happening with us all every day to some degree or another.

 

And then we wonder why our relationships fall apart.

 

Why we feel so anxious.

Afraid.

Insecure.

Inferior.

Small.

Lost. 

Lonely.

 

But think about it: How else would any child feel having to fend for themselves in an apparently adult world?

 

Without proper parental supervision, protection, structure or support?

 

As pseudo-adults, we futilely attempt to force others into fulfilling these infantile needs for us.

 

But this is doomed to failure.

 

What we didn't sufficiently receive in the past from our parents as children must be confronted in the present, painful though it may be.

 

The past traumas, sadness, disappointments and depression cannot be changed and must be accepted.

 

Becoming an adult means swallowing this "bitter pill," that, unfortunately for most of us, certain infantile needs were, maliciously or not, unmet by our imperfect parents or caretakers.

 

And they never will be, no matter how good or smart or attractive or spiritual or loving we become.

 

Those days are over. What was done cannot be undone. We should not as adults now expect others to meet all of these unfulfilled childhood needs. They cannot.

 

Authentic adulthood requires both accepting the painful past and the primary responsibility for taking care of that inner child's needs, for being a "good enough" parent to him or her now--and in the future.

 

It is pertinent that the adult part of the personality learns to relate to the inner child exactly as a good parent relates to a flesh-and-blood child, providing discipline, limits, boundaries and structure.

 

These are all - along with support, nurturance, and acceptance - indispensable elements of loving and living with any child, whether metaphorical or actual.

 

By initiating and maintaining an ongoing dialogue between the two, a reconciliation between inner child and mature adult can be reached.

 

A new, mutually beneficial, cooperative, symbiotic relationship can be created in which the sometimes conflicting needs of both the adult self and inner child can be creatively satisfied.

 

Has your adult self spent time with your inner child today?

 

(Source – Psychology Today & Dr. Diamond – Psychotherapist)

06/08/2020, 15:57 –

 

 

Tell yourself, today I am playful and free.

 

Answer these questions for yourself?

 

How can I tap into that childlike innocence and just be?

 

Where can I find play in my life?

 

How can I bring more play and that feeling of freedom into my life?

 

And then...

 

Find 3 things that are playful that you can do today.

06/08/2020, 15:57 - Shuba Rajan: Think it over...

 

I asked life, "Why are you so difficult?

Life smiled and said, "I am so simple, but, the problem is you people never appreciate simple things in life."

 

Where science ends, there imagination begins.

 

Here it goes..

 

We all have the potential to perform, if only we create the right  pathwithin ourselves.

 

Our life begins to change the moment we take complete responsibility for it and be totally accountable for it.

 

It's not important who is ahead of us in life.It's not important who is behind us too.What's important is who is with us.Who is walking along side us.

 

Real leaders are sometimes in the front, at times alongside us and at time behind us, but, when bthings get accomplished people will all say we did it.

That's the essence.

 

Have a great day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It begins, and brews before it spews, it's all in the mind...

 

After so many hundreds of years of intricacy the mystery of how a man's thought gets aroused is sorted out and confirms everything begins in the mind first...

It can be an argument...

A quarrel...

A fight...

A murder...

A war...

Well not just that even discoveries and innovations...

 

Everything begins and ends with the mind.

 

How we manage it, how we mend it, how we control it, makes all the difference...

 

A small satire to explain this...

 

Julius Caesar and Marcus Brutus are at the airport.

 

Brutus: “Which is our boarding gate Caesar?”

Caesar: “A-2 Brutus”

 

Brutus: “And what time is the flight Caesar?”

Caesar: “8:02 Brutus”

 

Brutus: “By the way, I have sandwiches. Do you want one Caesar?”

Caesar: “Ate two Brutus”

 

Brutus: “This is an unusual paper size for a ticket. What size is it Caesar?”

Caesar: “A2 Brutus”

 

Brutus (Thinking to himself): “This man is really beginning to get on my nerves. One of these days I’m going to have to kill him.”

 

....thus the devil was aroused in Brutus and Ceasar ceased to be because he was done in by three trusted mates around him.

 

Something that needs serious consideration is our mental well-being, scripted exclusively for members of this group...

R3 - Raman's Random Ramblings,

by

Raman

06/08/2020, 17:52 - Shuba Rajan: Simplest Success Mantra

 

Success just doesn't happen by chance. It can happen if we can adopt a process.

 

Let's understand fully that

it is our ability that makes things happens,

- by utilizing our best skills,

- believing in our

  capabilities,

- focussing solely on the

  things we have in front of

  us to accomplish,

- committing to work hard

  enough,

- pushing ourselves to keep

- learning, improving  and

  innovating constantly,

- making mistakes,

- realizing  accepting we did,  - working again and again

  till it gets rectified

- gaining new experiences

- persistenting on and on,

- overcoming barriers,

- taking on all the challenges - to meet the ends that

  translate all our acts to

  fructify.

 

Success embrace those who embrace all these aspects and strive tirelessly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The road from Transaction to Transformation.

 

Just to set the ball rolling let me begin by asking which hand is your preferred hand?

 

Right or left?

 

Let's assume  right.

 

Now if I ask you to write something you will immediately respond by beginning with your right, but, if I stop you and ask you to write with your left hand,  how does it feel?

 

Stange, awkward,  clumsy,  effort,  slow...... isn't it?

 

However if you practice, it becomes it may not sound as difficult, probably easier to who knows.

 

So lots of practice will make the left hand as good as the right hand and you become ambidextrous.

In short changing a habit requires lots of conscious practise. 

Great if you identify more things in yourself and become self-aware, which is the first act of Emotional Intelligence.

Now the next step is give yourself some signal that will tell you to take a pause,  then respond.

Journaling is also very helpful.  Don't be too hard on yourself.  Give yourself time.  Don't give up.

New habits will form.

All the best.

If everyone does this they and practice these principles they become Emotionally Intelligent too.

If all become aware of themselves and develop EI, the next step would then mean we need to understand each other too. That has then established an Emotional Quotient between each other.

When this transformation happens we will find that things become a lot easier to transact.

Think about this and make a beginning.